I had something to say to people when they asked me if I was a boy or a girl. I finally had a word to describe my experience. I started loosely identifying as intersex when I was in middle school. No one was preparing me for those types of experiences. I couldn’t wear swimsuits because I always had a noticeable bulge that the other girls made fun of. However, my enlarged clitoris made me feel different. I was told by mom and my doctors that I was a normal girl, especially since I already had my period.
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I knew I was different, I just didn’t know how to make sense of the differences. I remember discovering that I had an Adam’s apple around the same time I had my first period when I was eight. My entire body, including my legs, underarms, and torso was covered in hair. When I was in second grade I started growing facial hair and breasts at the same time. I wore pretty dresses and barrettes in my hair. There are others out there, waiting to meet new people with love. You will find that the intersex community is resilient, thriving, and global. If you are intersex, you can get connected to others via interACT Youth, a group for advocacy and peer support for ages 13-29. As these stories show, many teens are only told medical terminology, and later come to the word “intersex” through finding online resources. Many people might not even be aware that their bodily experiences fall under the intersex umbrella. There are many ways to have an intersex body, and not all of them involve surgery or parents finding out at birth. We still have to fight against our bodily integrity being taken from us. But intersex people can have any gender and sexuality, just like anyone else. The practice seemingly originates from a historical fear that intersex bodily differences mean a person will grow up to be gay or transgender. This puts us at risk in a medical system that can still recommend elective surgeries to “normalize” infant genitalia to parents. Some intersex differences are obvious at birth. While about 98% of human bodies match up with the two paths of sex development we learn about in sex ed, intersex bodies are extra creative: we have natural differences in our genitalia, chromosomes, gonads, internal sex organs, hormone production and response, and/or secondary sex traits, such as how we grow breasts or body hair. Intersex people have bodies that are just a little different.